FLOYD COUNTY — After weeks of awful campaign commercials and cheap plastic yard signs plaguing street corners, primary day has finally arrived in the great state of Indiana; a day in which political science majors like me get to tout their knowledge of the electoral process to anyone who will listen or read.

Trust me, few other benefits go along with such a degree besides low-paying government jobs, a plethora of law school loans or drunken late night college chats about the decline of America’s hegemony.

Oh, include using pretentious vocabulary like hegemony on that list of advantages.

As I’m writing this column, a sudden realization has occurred. I’m not excited about this election today. In fact, I could care less.

Maybe it’s because the presidential nominees have all but been decided. Alas, we know what it feels like to be the West Coast, perpetually watching repeats of television shows that all those other states have already experienced and laughed at hours in advance.

Likewise, earlier caucuses and primaries have already chosen a presidential hopeful for us. How Iowa, a state that bore Herbert Hoover, one of the worst presidents in history, and immortalized a cornfield-carved baseball diamond, has more of a say in the choice of candidates than we do is beyond me.

Could my new indifference be voter apathy, the societal condition that renders civic duty moot and that rusts away at the very foundation on which our sacred democratic principles stand? Surely my political science degree immunized me from such a filthy virus. If the effectiveness of that drug has already expired, watching “The West Wing” whenever possible must afford me an effective booster.

No. It’s official. I’m as interested in this election as women who read “Fifty Shades of Grey” are interested in good writing. Once in a while, a relevant story teases me by emerging from the media murk and tackling real issues like foreign policy or the solvency of Social Security and Medicare. Then, quickly, pundits arrive and distort the facts to their own party’s advantage.

Who knows the truth anymore? Everything has a slant. I even try to listen to the candidates’ own well-manicured words as they spread their message of hope or fiscal responsibility or renewal or efficiency.

But I’m just not buying any of it. Not this year.

When disillusionment hits, I retreat, trying to justify my despair. Does my vote really matter? Half the time, my husband flips the switch for the other candidate, basically nullifying my pick. Other times, I myself know nothing about the people running locally and mark my ballot arbitrarily.

Oh, that’s a nice name, I think. Or hmm, we need more women in office. The lady in question could be an incarnation of Stalin in drag, yet I vote for her based on gender alone.

Is this the correct way to decide who leads our government? No. Heck, it’s not even a good way to place a bet on a Derby horse. But I’m certain some people nowadays, including a poly sci major like me at times, put more work into selecting their morning cereal than they do about deciding on a candidate.

And that’s not right.

How do I start caring again and having high ideas about changing this country for the better through political involvement? I’m really not sure. I don’t even know if I’ll choose the Democratic or the Republican ballot today. And I really haven’t figured out who’ll get my vote for president in November. Is that even a dilemma?

Too often, columnists think they have all the answers and preach their supposed knowledge sanctimoniously to the masses. Not today. I’m as confused as other Americans about our political process and how chaotic the circus known as elections have become.

Yet today, I’ll still vote. Because sometimes that’s the best thing even political science majors, and their fancy vocabulary, can accomplish.

— Amanda Beam is a Floyd County resident and Jeffersonville native. Contact her by email at hoosiermandyblog@gmail.com or visit her blog at HoosierMandy.com.